


Never-Ending Love

by Angelwithwingsoffire



Series: 30 Days of Writing [4]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: M/M, Past Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-04
Updated: 2015-02-04
Packaged: 2018-03-10 11:55:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3289424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angelwithwingsoffire/pseuds/Angelwithwingsoffire
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Scott could feel the tears welling up in his eyes as he stood outside the bedroom door. He raised a shaky hand to wrap around the dog tags around his neck. It’s been two months since Scott got the news and two months since Scott set foot in the bedroom he’s called theirs for the past five years. But it isn't theirs anymore. It was only Scott's now. He would never share the bed with the love of his life ever again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Never-Ending Love

Scott could feel the tears welling up in his eyes as he stood outside the bedroom door. He raised a shaky hand to wrap around the dog tags around his neck. It’s been two months since Scott got the news and two months since Scott set foot in the bedroom he’s called theirs for the past five years. He knew it wasn’t going to smell like himself or _him_ or them anymore. Not after this long. The room was already losing the sweet scent of pine when the news came through. It’ll be gone by now.

He took a deep, shaky breath and reached out with his free hand to grasp the doorknob. He tightened his grip to the point of the doorknob buckling under his fingers and he couldn’t stop the voice in his head. _“You need to stop denting all our doorknobs Scottie the man at the hardware store is starting to think I have a fetish.”_ Fresh tears welled up in his eyes at the voice. It sounded so much like _him_. It’d been so long since he heard it in person and now he never will again. He can’t.

He took another deep breath to steady himself and steel himself for what he knew was to come before he pushed open the door and stepped inside. He nearly dropped to his knees at the smell. He was right. It didn’t smell like them anymore. There wasn’t a whiff of pine anywhere and somehow that hurt more than the voice being gone. He’d always loved the smell of pine surrounding him and everything around him and now it was gone.

Scott forced himself to take one more step inside and shut the door behind him. He resisted the temptation to just fall against the door and slide to the floor and just start crying like he has for weeks but he was determined not to. He was on a mission to keep his promise to the love of his life.

Scott forced himself to walk forward, to keep breathing in the air that didn’t smell like pine and smelled like dust instead and he just kept moving, heading towards the closet. He stepped inside and now the tears were coming down his face. Even his clothes don’t smell like pine anymore. He forced himself to take a few more steps before finally letting himself fall to his knees in front of the trunk kept at the back of their small walk-in closet. He just put his hands on the worn leather trunk and let the tears run down his face for a long moment. He’d never believed it would be him opening this trunk. He always thought it would be the other way around. But it’s not.

Scott lifted his right arm up to look at the tattoo etched into the inside of his wrist. They’d gotten it when they’d gotten married to bind them not only in love and marriage, but also in their souls and magic. It’d always been a mark of their love, facing the needles together, and now it was the key to the last gift he’d ever get from the man he loves.

Scott took another deep breath, trying to keep himself under control, and turned his arm to press his wrist against the lock on the trunk. It pulsed warm under his arm and then clicked open. Scott steeled himself for the pain he knew was to come and pushed the lid open.

He whimpered at the smell. It was old and dusty and mangy but it was pine and it was beautiful. Tears streamed from his eyes at the scent and he had to bite his tongue to stop himself from sobbing. He had to do this. He had to keep going.

Scott wiped the tears from his face and looked inside the trunk, lifting out the contents one by one to look at.

First came a big photo album with a picture of them on the cover. He opened it and had to grin at the picture on the first page of the two of them on their wedding day. He was dressed in a tux, aka the ‘monkey suit’ that he’d been forced into but his kept hold on the man next to him dressed in his army dress greens and looking more handsome than Scott had even remembered. Both of them were laughing at someone off camera, their eyes squished shut with their grins plastered across their faces. Scott was glad someone had gotten this kind of picture, candid and beautiful, without his eye glare messing it up. He’d always hated the glare and he hated it even more now with so few good pictures to look at of the two of them. Scott knew he wouldn’t be able to look at anymore pictures without crying so he just closed the book, hugged it tight, and then set it aside to pull out the next thing.

The second thing he grabbed was a big box with a bow tied at the front to keep it closed and Scott grinned. He remembered all the trouble tying that stupid little bow had caused and he was almost hesitant to undo it but he needed to see what was inside. He smiled at the sight. It was a box of trinkets from their childhood together. There was a shovel from a sandbox, the pink crayon from kindergarten, Scott’s first inhaler, the sheriff’s old deputy badge, a spark plug to the old jeep that finally coughed its last breath in college, and dozens of other things, all with stories and laughs behind them. It was box of memories that Scott was determined to never let slip away.

Scott set the box aside carefully, not wanting to break the small crystal star that rested near the top, and reached for the second box inside the trunk. When he opened it, tears pricked up again. There was a DVD in a little clear case right on top with a DVD player underneath it so Scott didn’t even have to get up to watch it. And there was a little note on the DVD player that made him smile wide.

_I know you won’t want to get up…_ It said. _So here’s a little gift so you don’t have to._

Scott took shaky breaths, trying not to start crying as he fumbled to put the little disc  into the player and start it.

“Hey Scottie.” A voice said from the black screen. Scott’s heart broke at the sound. He’d thought he’d never hear it again, and yet here it was.

“If you’re watching this, either you broke the rules or I’m no longer around to enforce them. And if the second is the case, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” The voice broke. “And if the first is the case, stop being an ass and put this all away. You know the rules.”

Scott laughed a little brokenly at that and his breath hitched as the DVD finally had visual. He paused the screen just to stare at the face in front of him. It was younger than the one he’d kissed goodbye at the fence, but that was to be expected of a five year old video. But while it was different, it was still the same. The grin was wide and open and the freckles and moles were all right where they were supposed to be and the hair was just as wild. Scott could hardly believe how gorgeous the man he married is. _Was._ He corrected himself. He didn’t know if he’d ever get used to the past tense.

When Scott finally regained control, he pressed play again.

“I want to start by saying that I love you.”

Scott smiled at the words. He’d never get tired of hearing them.

“You are one of the most adorable people I’ve ever met and I love you. I love your smile and your eyes and your crooked jaw. And I love your laugh and your lips and your ‘O’ face when you orgasm. I love your hands and your touch and your love. God I fucking love your love.”

Scott couldn’t hold back a laugh at that. Those words were the same he’d heard at their wedding and it was amazing and yet horribly sad that he was hearing them said again like this.

“But most of all, Scottie, I love you. I love you so fucking much and you need to know that if I died over there I did it with you on my mind. For the past ten years you’ve been my first thought when I get up and my last thought before I go to sleep and a damn big majority of every thought in between. I love you and I’m so fucking sorry I’ll never get to say those words again and that I won’t ever be around to hear you say them back.” His voice broke and Scott was crying with him as they both tried to recover.

“I want you to know that I’ve never once regretted joining up. I never once changed my mind or wanted to back out but I’ve never wanted to leave you alone. And I’m sorry that I’m doing so now. I’m leaving you alone to raise Claude and Maddie on your own but I know you’ll do amazing. Let Kira give them the talk when they get old enough just like we decided because I know you’ll want to but you will suck even more than I would’ve and they need to be informed, not confused.”

Scott blushed a little at that. He really was hopeless with the whole puberty and sex talk stuff, even more so than his husband.

“And I know this is going to be hard.” The tape continued. Scott couldn’t tear his eyes away from the whiskey eyes on the small screen, filled with just as many tears as his own. “But you’re going to get through. I know you will. You have Claude and Maddie and the entire pack to help you out and you will be fine. It’s going to hurt like hell for a while, I don’t know how long, but eventually the pain will stop hurting so bad. And if you some day meet someone else and you fall in love again, well don’t let my memory stop you. I don’t want to be forgotten, but I don’t want to hold you back either.”

“I won’t.” Scott whispered to the screen. “There’s no one else like you.”

“Tell Claude and Maddie I love them, because I do. I love them so much. But don’t ever forget that I loved you too. You’re not alone Scott. You weren’t when we were younger and you aren’t now. I may not be at your side like I always was, but you’ve got the pack and you’ve got our kids and you will make it through this. I know you will. I know because I love you, and I only love the strongest people. We had a good run Wolf-boy, nut now I guess it’s time for me to say goodbye. So goodbye, my old friend, my husband, my love, we had good times and bad and I loved you through them all right up until the end. Goodbye. I love you Scott McCall.”

As the video faded out, Scott finally let the tears out. He closed the DVD player and set it aside before drawing his knees up to his chest, burying his face in them, and letting the sobs go.

Later, if you asked Scott what he’d been feeling those first two months, he wouldn’t have been able to tell you. Every day blended together into one big long hazy torture fest of goodbyes and loss and pain and tears until Scott wasn’t even sure what day of the week it was let alone what he did. But if you asked him about this moment, this moment of pain after watching his husband’s last goodbye, he’d be able to tell you exactly what it felt like.

If you asked Scott what it felt like, he’d tell you that losing a pack member feels like losing a limb in the most painful way imaginable, but losing your mate, your husband, your one and only, hurts even more. It’s worse than the pain of wolfsbane in his veins. He’d tell you it was worse than when he watched Allison die. He’d tell you it was worse than the time a witch stuck a white iron poker into his shoulder. He’d tell you it was worse than being tortured to the brink of death by hunters. He’d tell you it was worse than anything you could possibly imagine. He’d tell you that it feels like your heart is being pulled out of your chest and your head is being crushed under the loss and everyone around you is strangling you with their sympathies and you can’t breathe, you can’t think, you can’t move, you can’t do anything but sit there and feel the pain because there’s nothing you can do to make it better they’re gone and they’re never coming back and it _hurts_. It hurts more than anything else in the world. And Scott’s drowning in the pain he’s tried for weeks to lock away as it comes pouring over the dam in his mind and floods every part of his body with its toxin.

Scott reached out blinding his hand, fumbling to restart the video.

“Hey Scottie.” He hears. “If you’re watching this, either you broke the rules or I’m no longer around to enforce them. And if the second is the case, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” The voice broke. “And if the first is the case, stop being an ass and put this all away. You know the rules. I want to start by saying that I love you. You are one of the most adorable people I’ve ever met and I love you. I love your smile and your eyes and your crooked jaw. And I love your laugh and your lips and your ‘O’ face when you orgasm. I love your hands and your touch and your love. God I fucking love your love. But most of all, Scottie, I love you. I love you so fucking much…”

Scott stopped the video and took a shuddering breath, regaining control of his body as his breathing evened out at the sounds of that voice.

“I love you too.” He whispered. “I love you more than I ever thought I would love someone. You were always there and I never thought about just how big a piece of me your were until you weren’t there to fill that hole anymore. I love you Stiles. I’ll never stop. Not ever.”

**Author's Note:**

> Come hang out with me on [tumblr](http://perfectalphadouchebag.tumblr.com/)!


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